HAPPY BIRTHDAY BRENNA!!!!!!

Today is my first baby's birthday! Her Dad and I were 20 years old when I decided that we wanted to have a baby! It never occurred to either of us that maybe we were a little too young because after all Rob was born when his mom was 18 and at 20 we had been married 2 years!! Ignorance is bliss[Ha]! The first pregnancy test was negative and I was disappointed! I had a friend that worked in a free clinic so she offered to take a sample for me and get a free pregnancy test-no running to the store to get a pregnancy test in the 70's! She called me while she was there and told me that it was positive and since Roe vs. Wade was pretty new she had to ask the question[ a DR. was standing beside her] " Was I going to continue the pregnancy?" I was shocked and so I think I stuttered "yes"! They were doing abortions in the free clinic and I had never even considered that I might be asked that question. I told Rob the pregnancy test was positive after I got off the phone, but he was watching some western on tv and I think He said OK without taking his eyes off the tv!!! It was a week or 2 before I could get into the Dr. and I don't remember talking about it until after I had been to the DR. and had it confirmed that I really was pregnant that he finally said "Are you sure? Ok lets not get too excited you've got along time to go!!" It wasn't until I finally started showing at about 5 months was it ok to talk about the possibility of having a baby!! It was strange to me that I when I went home to Kansas that my Mom and Rob's mom thought it was awful of me to mention that I felt the baby kicking or to even mention that I had a fetus on board! When My Mother was pregnant with me she stayed in the house and did not ever talk about being pregnant because that subject was taboo in those ancient times! I had the very first pregnancy sonogram in the city of Denver. Another friend was a radiologist and the hospital had just gotten the first sonogram machine in the state and she wanted to practice on a pregnant person . It was very exciting to see a picture of the baby. They were not advanced enough to be able to tell the sex of the baby. The day I was in labor was no different than any days that I had had for the 3 weeks before, except that I was so miserably more tired. I did laundry that day climbing 2 floors with every load and I was so dumb, that I Just did it,never considering that my husband who was sitting on the sofa watching football could've gotten up and helped me!! The woman's movement hadn't caught up with me yet!!! It didn't occur to him either! I had been having contractions for 3 weeks some of them getting to five minutes apart after a few hours but then stopping. I called my Dr. about 6 pm and left a message about how miserable I was and how the contractions would come and go. We were having an ice storm that had started maybe an hour before I called. The after hours operator called the Dr. on call [not from my Dr.s practice] and told him that I had been in labor all day and that my contractions were 2 min. apart-not what I had said at all! The Dr. on call's wife called me and said that her husband had already left for the hospital and that I should go immediately. I asked her why? And she told me what the operator had told him. I told her that I called but not because I had regular labor but because I was so tired and hadn't been able to sleep and I felt miserable! Her reply was "Oh." and she said well, go to the hospital anyway because her husband had gone and he could check me anyway. No cell phones! So I told Rob and he was furious with me because he just knew that I wasn't in labor and that they would just send us back home and besides there was an ice storm going on and he didn't want to drive the 2 1/2 blocks to the hospital. Well, it turned out that I was in labor and was already dilated. [So there, Mr. Grouch!!] 17 hours later and no fetal monitor and no drugs of any kind until I went to the OR, Brenna was born by emergency c-section. I was muttering every curse word I had ever heard [women didn't use those words or at least my family and my Mormon friends didn't!] and one of the nurses heard me and said oh, Honey you don't mean that. HA, I Did Too!!! I Brenna h for a second before they took her to the nursery or maybe NICU, I can't remember and I did'nt see her again until evening! OH and Rob just reminded me that when I first got to the hospital. the nurse told me that they were sending someone from the lab to draw blood. I said I hope it's not the guy I had here at the hospital when I was first pregnant, he was awful-it had been his first week and he had been very nervous and had to stick me 12 times before he could draw blood. He also was crazy looking ,dressed like a hippy with really long hair with feathers in it and some kind of funky leather vest with low cut hippy pants and he also had severe physical deformities. He and I both were sweaty and exhausted by the time he finished! Well, guess who showed up on Sunday evening to draw blood? Hippy Dude! and there was no one else to do it when I told the nurse that I wanted someone else. I only had to endure about 7 sticks before he got it. My Mormon friend Susan had a c-section a few days before and so she was still there. Rob had n0 money with him because he just knew we were going to be sent back home and had left it in our apt. He was afraid to go home because they telling us that the baby would be here anytime. Kent, my friends husband bought him a piece of pie before he left for the night. So. Brenna you were born on Monday morning! We stayed in the hospital only 5 days[the norm for a c-section was at least a week] because our insurance hadn't started when I got pregnant. My mom came for 5 days to drive me a little crazy, because every time I tried to lay down she would say,Are you going to sleep your life away? I had only heard that about a million times as a teenager because farm people don't ever sleep in and never, ever, lay on the bed during daylight hours! Only, maybe, when you were so sick that you might die standing up! But she did cook and clean!! We thought you were the cutest little thing we had ever seen!!!About 2 days before my mom left you woke up with a blister on the inside of your arm. I called the Dr. every day for about 3 days with the nurse acting like I was crazy and neurotic,about the first blister and then you got the second blister and the 4th day the Dr. answered the phone and told me to bring you in immediately. He treated you for 5 weeks and never told us what it was. We had to take you to the pediatricians off ice every day including Thanksgiving Day for 5 whole weeks with him dodging whenever we tried to find out what was wrong. After you were completely well [and looking like an Ethopian starved infant] he finally admitted that you had staph infection from the hospital. WOW,we knew something was wrong! But you know in spite of you being so sick and your parents being young and ignorant,we took good care of you and were thrilled to have you!! The one thing that saved you was that I did every single thing the pediatrician told me and did not question him.!!!! We thought you were the most beautiful and brilliant child ever born!! Other children were ugly and not smart at all compared to the Beautiful and smart Brenna!! You were a fun child that spent all the time with her mother and endured many moves with a salesman father. I thoroughly enjoyed you as a teenager[I know we were strict] and I have really liked you as an a adult and I love you now! Happy Birthday! I"ve always loved you!! I have always been proud of you!

Queen of Procrastinators

I have been supposed to have been getting taxes ready for the accountant for the past 2 weeks and I have not started yet! The appointment is tomorrow! I hate doing taxes and somehow my husband has managed to make it my total responsibility without my realizing it, until his excuse can be that only I{me} know how to do it and my gosh, he just doesn't have time and has no idea where to start!Lucky, Lucky ME!! I worked at Republican headquarters and I really enjoyed it! The mood there wasn't too positive after the debate. I am hoping that people do get out and vote and make the right choice!!! My McCain-Palin sign only lasted about 4 days in my front yard!!!!!!

P.S.

This is a P.S. to my last blog!!I forgot to say that I really, really am proud of Kelli for her determination to finish school and become a nurse. She is such a good Mom that I know that there are many times she would probably like to say the heck with this, I'm just going to quit and stay home!!

A Love Note To My Daughters

Well, I've got so many things running amok in my head that I don't know which one to write about! I really want to write about my daughters and how much they mean to me. This is already making me cry! I love them so much they will never know how much . I am so proud of them as grownups and moms. I'm proud of Brenna for trying to be understanding with me and for her being a good mom to those two precious boys that I don't see enough of and for being levelheaded [except for the Obama thing!} She may not tell me what I want to hear but I always know she'll tell me what she really thinks. I'm also proud of Brenna for trying to go back to school. I know that it's hard to make the decision and do it after you have been out of school for a while. I'm so proud of Kelli's strength In dealing with a sick husband and sick baby and a six year old starting "Big" school [First Grade] and for making such good grades in school, in spite of all that. I am so proud of Kelli for being willing to help me out almost at a moments notice. I'm proud of Erin for making the decision to put Bella in school {I know it's scary for her {Erin} with Bella's dairy allergy} I'm proud of Erin for knowing when things need to change and figuring out how to make the change.I'm proud of Erin for finding her niche. I never knew that animals would have anything to do with it, though!!! I understand that it's been hard to deal with me with the surgeries and my chronic pain. I know that these things have changed me and I am so sorry for it. I try hard to keep going and be as much a part of Brenna, Brady, Bowie, Kelli, Keelin, Kinsey, Erin and Bella's lives as distance and circumstances allow. I love the babies almost as much as their moms. Well, truthfully I love you all without condition. And why wasn't I in any of the zoo pics???? HA!

9-11

I was in Nashville yesterday and I did not hear or see anything to remind people that it was the 9-11 Anniversary. The only thing that I saw was the front page of USA Today. I didn't see any flags on buildings or anything out of the ordinary. It was very disappointing to me. That September morning has left a crystal clear picture in my mind of what we all should never forget. I heard the beginning of what took place that day from the mouth of a 4 year old. He walked into my classroom saying "Mrs. Fisk, did you know that an airplane crashed into a big tall building? " It was around 9 am. I asked Dalton "How do you know?" He told me that he and his Grandpa had heard it on their way to school. In the next few minutes another parent confirmed that had really happened and told us where. We had a radio at school and I was able to hear what happened next. I immediately thought of Rob and where he might be. I knew he was flying somewhere that day but I couldn't remember when and where. I frantically called his office and found out that he had not left for the airport yet. I was relieved. but he could not be convinced of what had happened and insisted that he was still going to fly out on his business trip. I remember feeling so frustrated. I couldn't talk very long as I had a classroom of 4 year olds waiting on me. I then thought of Kelli. Kelli had just moved to Baltimore and was 7 mo. pregnant with Keelin. And then Erin and Joe.Panic set in as I was thinking that I had to find out where my chicks were. I can always rely on Brenna to be calm and talk with sense so I went back to the office to call her and have her call her Dad and exlain what had happened and to make sure Kelli was Ok and that Erin and Joe had not been on a plane yet,because they were supposed to fly out of Dulles that day. I was afraid that maybe they had tried to come home early that day. Brenna had not heard what had happened. I told her to turn on the tv but they had just moved and the tv was not hooked up yet so she turned on the radio . She was shocked but agreed to make those calls to her Dad and sisters and then let me know if they were all accounted for. When she called back I was so relieved that my chicks were ok[ Brenna included]and also that she would be at home when I finally was able to get there.I wanted to go home so bad and be there with her but our director thought it best for the children if we just continued business as usual. I remember hearing on the school radio at one point that planes were falling out of the sky and that the New York skyline was completely gone and burning. That day, I had one parent come to pick her child up early.That was the last time that I saw that child and her mother. Her mother called back and said that she could not bear to have her child somewhere that she couldn't get to in a few minutes. I completely understood. My children were grown but I wanted them near me in case something like this happened again. I could hardly stand that Kelli was living so far away and I wanted Erin and Joe home that minute. I wanted them in front of my eyes so that I could see that they continued to be all right. I didn't believe that having 4 planes crashed and all those people killed was the end for the terrorists. I was waiting for the other to shoe to fall then and I still believe that it will sometime.

Birthdays

Kelli, my second daughter just had her 31st birthday yesterday. Birthdays or birth days are really important to Mothers. I'm sure that I am not that the only mother that gets a little nostalgic when celebrating one of her children's birthdays. I say to my daughter{whichever one is the birthday girl} "I remember what I was doing{ however many years old they are} today!" I don"t think they really enjoy my reminiscing anymore and I get the feeling that at least one or more is sick of hearing my stories of things that have happened to her Dad and I. That makes me sad because I think family history is so important, but maybe it is only important to me at this time. I am going to tell a little of the story! Anyway, I love thinking about my daughter's birthdays. In Kelli's birth story I always think back to the years before she was born. We had been trying for a while to have another baby, but no success, so on I went to fertility doctors and went through all those unpleasant tests and the emotional roller coaster of doing all this and still not getting pregnant. Finally after tests and more tests I was told that we would not be having anymore children and that I was the reason . After that, I gave up. I stopped the fertility drugs and the trips to the Dr.s. I just couldn't believe it-we had Brenna and I had never considered the idea that there would not be other babies. So, I was sad for about 3 months and then I had another thought.........Maybe......the Dr.s weren't right? Thirty-one years and six months ago you couldn't just go to the store and get a pregnancy test, you had to go to the Dr. and pee in a cup and then go home and wait. I didn't have much hope because I had tricked myself into thinking I was pregnant so many times before and had taken a test each one of those times and they all had turned out negative. But to my big surprise this one was positive! I was so excited and Rob was too, even though he was afraid to believe that we were going to have a baby until he could actually see it! That night I ended up in the hospital having been diagnosed with a cyst the size of a grapefruit on an ovary. I had been in pain all day but had told myself it was because I was nervous about the pregnancy test. Even though I threw up for the next six months and thought that I might die of a heatstroke being pregnant and suffering through an Oklahoma summer, I was thrilled to be having another baby! The day before I was to go into the hospital to have a c-section, I was a nervous wreck. I tried to make some food ahead of time that Brenna and Rob could have while I was in the hospital-I burned everything to a crisp-all inedible! We didn't know if we were having a Kasey, Kelli or a Patrick but it didn't matter to us. Kelli Lynn arrived September 7th in early morning. We were thrilled! She was so beautiful! I am so happy to have had this precious infant, adorable toddler, sesitive child, crazy teenager, wild young woman and now a good Mom to 2 precious girls for these past 31 years. I can't imagine my life if those Dr.s had been right with their diagnosis.

Summertime Blues

Here I am and now what????OK....I will talk about heat and summer since my daughters have all posted strong feelings about that. I'm with Kelli and Erin. I HATE heat and the stinking, muggy Summer in the South! I've discovered that most southerners Just love this stinking, muggy and miserable heat (I guess that you probably have just realized that I don't consider myself a southerner-NEVER have and NEVER will) and they will go on to tell me that they just can't get enough of this heat. What's up with that? Sorry Brenna-I just prefer my days to be about 65 or less! Maybe you like summer and hot weather because you were born in a cold place-Denver Colorado. The day you were born was a snowy, icy day, too! Since I have talked a little about Southerners I am tempted to go on about living in Georgia and how I really consider myself more of a Kansas, Oklahoma, Texas kind of girl but I guess I will save it for later!

Bowie's Birthday

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